Quote:
Originally Posted by Miguel'smom
So I'm bringing back this thread so I don't spam the board. I "see" pdoc in about 3 weeks. So that means I've been on meds for almost 3 months. I've been watching things on psychosis and it doesn't seem like that's the issue right now because I know I'm wrong in not thinking I'm real but it feels so real. The problem is usually I know when my thinking is off. That doesn't stop me from believing it or having issues because of it. I don't feel I'm my husband's imagination more like I'm an animated doll. I know I'd bleed if I get hurt but I feel it'd be just a cut into more skin or hollow. I know it's because I'm depressed, numb. The video's helped me not feel bad about the things I thought about three weeks ago. I think high levels of financial stress then being left alone and thinking someone was breaking in for 7 hrs thinking someone was drilling into the door for that time kinda did me in. I "see" T Tuesday I'm not looking forward to being honest with her.Has anyone told their T anything like this and not been suggested IP? I don't see my T as squishy which is really good but I don't know pdoc really last time didn't go so well but I know H and M like him. I have my issues wrote down but I don't know if I can vocalize them because it's not a short 2 sentence thing.I want to prove to myself I'm real but honestly even if I tried it wouldn't help. I think I'm fine not feeling real for a couple of weeks. I'm just scared of what my treatment team will suggest.
I keep thinking how the **** do you control this with diet? (my dad told me you can, I know he's wrong, but it's hard) I am eating 1x a day (H is making me I'm not arguing) I just see it as a waste since I'm not real.
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MM--
I am so sorry you are struggling. Hang in there, it will get better.
The symptom you describe is part of a classic set of experiences described in psychosis over the decades. I lived w guy at the hospital who believed he had been placed on a phony, imitation earth and that all the "people" were imitators of the real and true people on the actual and true earth. It is a variant of what you have.
There is a lot of neuro stuff behind this, but the quickie version is that parts of the brain associated with face identification and the correct sense of self are misfiring.
Has nothing to do w looking in a mirror. Long story.
Psychosis is weird. It is not binary. The other nt I received commands from God to walk down to the protests so the stirm troopers cld beat me up or kill me. To show my faith. BUT, A tiny part of still functioning me told me that was insanely dangerous and I did not go. Thank God. Very hard not to follow the commands. Lucky.
So, having a level of awareness and insight does not mean you are not psychotic. It just means it cld be worse. Much.
Be careful.
Hugs.