Let's start by saying I was diagnosed bipolar type 2 about 6 years ago, and have made tremendous strides mentally since then. I take my meds, but do have to switch them regularly. However I am also a recovering addict and alcoholic. I have been in a wonderful and supportive relationship for the past 6 years as well. My life is great, everyone is taken care of financially, I do not have a want that I cannot have. That being said, at some point I always cycle back to the feeling of wanting to escape it. To leave my life, and go back to partying, and sex, and all the impulsive craziness that I lived for so long. I know if I went after that again I would lose everything in my life. But sometimes when it comes around I cant stop thinking about it. I dont know which one I really want. I know what I should do, but I question it so much