Hi guys. I am bipolar type 2, but I do have bouts of hypomania sometimes. I go through a few different cycles. They have improved and decreased in frequency over the years but I still struggle with this. Before I was with my now boyfriend, I did a lot of drugs, alcohol, partying, risky behaviours, and sex with anyone. About 3 years into this relationship I started getting better about not doing these things anymore. Currently I am 4 years sober from drugs and I have been working on the more prevalent issue of alcoholism for years. It's gotten much better. My relationship has had to have a lot of work, treating my bipolar and going to therapy, trying to settle into a normal family lifestyle. But I have cycles, where I want to run from it all. I want to have sex for money, and go out, and get high, and just throw my whole life away. I almost did in the beginning, but made a lot of steps and cutting people off to prevent that. But eventually, it always comes back. There is no reason I should want to be single with a 9 year old starting from scratch, my life is great, we have everything we want and need. But sometimes the urge to throw it all away and go back gets so strong. Does anyone have any experience with this?