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Originally Posted by whatever2013
I'm just so lonely because of COVID-19. I want to see people in person. I took a shower and did my hair special to go out and socialize with my neighbors this evening. But only one of them was out. We had a nice chat but it was too short. I enjoyed seeing her and tried to take in the full experience by noticing her whole being and what she was wearing. She had a nice casual outfit on.
But it was only about ten minutes and now i'm back to just me. I thought of contacting the guy i last dated. He's a bit unsavory tho and i would just end up being afraid of him. He's got delusional disorder and has been to jail for assault. He vapes constantly and drinks and smokes up. I really shouldn't contact him but at least he would pay attention to me. I must not contact him. Every time i have gone with a guy due to loneliness i have regretted it.
It's just: i can't very well ask someone to go for coffee because of the darn pandemic. Always before when i felt lonely i would go to my mental health drop-in and chat and feel better. But it's been closed for months and has no signs of re-opening. I've gotten phone support from them before but i want to SEE people! There's a ZOOM event i may try tomorrow but i find ZOOM a poor substitute.
I left my dog inside tonight i was so determined i would have a decent chat with my neighbors. She fusses when i try and talk to people. But tonight of all nights they were not around.
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Whether we like it or not humans need human interaction, in a physical dynamic way. It’s not enough to do zoom calls, or TeleHealth, or isolate completely. I absolutely hate dealing with people and have very very few friends, and every measure counts (eg. zoom calls, TeleHealth), but we need to be with people and feel connected and alive. I think it’s GREAT you took time to talk to your neighbor. It wasn’t perfect and too short, but it was something. I think that’s incredible. Also, stay away from that guy— your ex. It’s tempting I’m sure but it’s just more problems in the end.
Thank you for this tonight. It just kind of put into perspective for me what isolating does to a person. Being vocal only when you need help is a problem in itself. We should always strive to be heard and to be with people to feel connected.
I hope with everything going on in the world you can find a piece that’ll help you get through it all. If I were there— I’d keep you entertained all day long and enjoy every moment with you. I’ve learned a lot about your personality here and I can say I know we’d be great friends in real life. Even if I cant be there in person; I’m always here to listen @
whatever2013 . Stay strong— it sucks for all of us.