
Aug 04, 2020, 12:46 PM
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Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,406
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This is a great question, Fuzzybear!
For me I know I have healthy boundaries with someone when I feel like (a) I can express myself and how I'm feeling, including discussing conflict with that person, without feeling like I have to tiptoe around them and (b) like the relationship isn't exhausting me or draining me. I mean, if you think about it, something healthy generally feels good for you; whereas when it's unhealthy, it will feel bad and have a wear/tear on you. To me an unhealthy boundary actually means a lack of a boundary. It seems like when we talk about boundaries that are unhealthy, we are really referring to (often) boundaries we haven't set or don't exist. So I'm not really sure if I think that there are boundaries that are healthy versus unhealthy. In my experience I think it's more likely that there are simply boundaries, which are inherently healthy, and no boundaries, which are inherently unhealthy.
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?
Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.
Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien
Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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