Dear woofwoof,

There's a great book I read recently: 'Affluenza' by Oliver James. A really excellent read on lots of topics related to comparing ourselves to others, chasing dreams which are not our own but ones dictated by consumer society, and tips on feeling ok about yourself just as you are. It's a wide-ranging book with chapters on people in different countries and how they differ in these respects (Asian countries are in there too). It might give you a wider perspective on some of the issues you are talking about.

I also think it's worth mentioning that moving to another country, with your own culture, family, and friends really far away, is bound to be extremely stressful. It sounds a little as if your sister-in-law, besides being a somewhat annoying individual, has become the focus of lots of issues around simply being somewhere strange and having to get used to a lot of new things.

I'd say take it easy on yourself (I know, this is easy to say and what the heck does it mean anyway!), try to find your own place and own friends in your new country, try to get involved in something you enjoy, and above all, give yourself TIME to adjust! Don't underestimate what a shock to the system a move like that is.

I wish you patience and ease of mind! It's a long journey sometimes, but one worth making because you'll be a happier and stronger person at the end of it.

All the best,
Stingy