Today I'm calmer. I have trouble recognizing when I'm in crisis. Is this a crisis? I don't feel I'm steps away from the hospital, I never feel that way though. I'm safe enough, I need to show my treatment team I don't need the safety of the hospital. I see T 1x a week, Is that not enough? I see pdoc in 12 days. That doesn't seem to long from now. My H knows and is reassuring me but I hate being needy. I hate to change my medication but pdoc is going to want me to. I think I'm getting better, IDK. I wish this didn't come with so much self advocacy. I want to see if I can make it to my next appointments.