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Originally Posted by Miguel'smom
I'm sorry it took me so long to reply I'm having trouble reading. and concentrating.
Eating and nutritionist has always been hard for me but I am working on it. I do need to exercise more. I use to spend my summer in the pool and I haven't swam in 6+ years. spiritual practices are not my thing but I can try meditation again. I am generally active but I get tired of distracting myself from my issues. I'm not a reader but I do watch everything on youtube about BP/SzA/SZ. I really have to get better at self care, I don't have anything I enjoy besides coloring but I need to learn to draw and I'm dreading it. I have to go back to the 6 hours of productive things a day. I'll try pulling it all together.
I'm the sane one of the family. I can't burden them with my issues. They have their own problems. I'm not honest with them and honestly they're not safe to be honest with. My dad thinks diet can control any medical issues and my mom who ... well she's mom.
I don't try to with hold it just doesn't occur to me that it's weird. Everyone IRL says I have good insight. The only one who was aware of my mess was old T because I wrote down everything unedited for her. There was only one time I didn't say something to her because I knew I was unsafe. Most of the time I feel like I am safe, and I should be trusted. I do say things after they pass if it something that could have lead to IP. I need to stop that. I loose sight that getting better is the goal,
I don't know if this has any cohesion. I'm sorry if it does not.
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It has great cohesion. You're a much better communicator than you give yourself credit for
You definitely have all of the pieces. Putting them together is the next step. Don't let it feel daunting. Make it easy by spending 30 min or so writing out a menu of activities for yourself to choose from today. Try not to worry about getting to all of them. Just focus on doing them continually throughout the day. Switch when it feels good.
Your Dad is perhaps off in his thinking diet is a cure, but he is right that it is a big factor. The keto diet has been successful for patients with schizophrenia. The Mediterranean diet has shown success for depression and other issues. A diet rich in healthy fats, lean proteins and lots of veggies would be good. Processed food and food prepared outside the home would be things to avoid. That's if you're wanting to go there. For now maybe focus on several well balanced meals a day or if you prefer, you could do many small snack size meals. The goal would be just to keep your metabolism processing the chemicals from the meds at regular intervals. That helps with stability.
All families have limitations. Mine included
When I suggested checking in I meant more just call and talk small talk just to give yourself regular human interaction. I know talking is hard for you sometimes and you like to withdraw. Regular chats about everyday stuff can help get you out of your head more amd help promote balance.
As for spiritual, it doesn't even have to feel spiritual. Watching a sunrise or sunset is spiritual. Sitting in the grass is spiritual. Listening to the birds. Listening to meditation music even if you don't like meditating. There are great videos on YouTube.
Our spirit connects us to everything that makes is human, everything that is smaller than we are and everything that is larger. You can go tiny or universal. There's no wrong way to do it. Its mostly just about slowing down and getting out of your head for a bit. Its about appreciating your place in the world and honoring others.
Learning about the disorders from videos is a great way. I love Dr. Tracey Marks. She is awesome. I also like a channel called Therapy in a Nutshell. She's a therapist and a great teacher. Check those two channels out if you're interested. Lots of helpful information and techniques.
Giving all of the information is important, and it will come in time. Trust is hard and even when we trust we sometimes withhold things for various reasons. Just give it your best effort and reflect afterward to see how you did.
In all of this strive for progress over perfection. Each step forward is a victory. Each step backward is an opportunity. We are all learning. Trial and error is the only way because there is no one formula that works for all and what works now may not work in the future. Be kind to yourself and push yourself.
You have tremendous strength to cope as long as you have. Hopefully you can see through my eyes a bit and see there is much to be hopeful for.
Oh and those yoga videos bpcyclist mentioned are great. She's so calming and I love her dog