It’s been a long long night. For what it’s worth I only spent about half my shift actually working so that’s the plus side— bad side is I spent half my shift fighting a panic attack and being ungodly anxious, worried and upset.

So TMI, but I’ve been having some digestive issues. We can leave it at that. And at work the other I had to use the bathroom. Yes of coarse brought my time off task pretty high. So as expected and I was talk to you about my time off task and asked you know what was going on. I explained I had bathroom issues. It’s not that big of a deal. It’s not a you’re fired kind of situation, in fact my manager has little to do with it anyway but he’s the one who talks to you about it but long story short it’s not that big of a deal. So while it is important and while there is technically paperwork involved etc. It essentially is acknowledging I had a lot of time “off task”.

That part went fine that part wasn’t so frustrating it was the part that came towards the end that really got me upset. Keep in mind I’ve never worked a job where I didn’t have more autonomy than I do here and I don’t know the protocols and it’s something I’m learning to to work through. It’s not like you I’ve had much training in general about how to handle situations outside of pick a damn item and put it in the cart.
Keep in mind I’ve never worked a job where I didn’t have more autonomy than I do here and I don’t know the protocols and it’s something I’m learning to to work through. It’s not like you I’ve had much training in general about how to handle situations outside of pick a damn item and put it in the cart.
The manager, Who I met for the first time yesterday I didn’t know his name or face and he’s my main manager, wanted to know why I didn’t come to him with this problem yesterday. It was less asking and him asserting I should have. When I tried to gently express I’m new, I didn’t know I was supposed to tell him, I didn’t know where to find him, and I’ve never seen him before in the month I’ve been there and it’s a personal issue so it’s not exactly rolling off my tongue to define a stranger to tell.When I tried to gently express I’m new, I didn’t know I was supposed to tell him, I didn’t know where to find him, and I’ve never seen him before in the month I’ve been there and it’s a personal issue so it’s not exactly rolling off my tongue to define a stranger to tell. I think he saw me saying that as a reflection of him and him doing his job, because he goes into this rant about how he has 300 people he hast to manage and he can’t know there’s a problem unless someone says something and I should’ve asked anybody wearing a vest to help find him and blah blah blah. His point doesn’t negate mine and I hope that he realizes that I wasn’t trying to do that but it got to the point where it’s escalating in the escalating to the point that it’s just not successfully communicating at all. His point doesn’t negate mine and I hope that he realizes that I wasn’t trying to do that but it got to the point where it’s escalating in the escalating to the point that it’s just not successfully communicating at all. He actually said “I think you’re being disrespectful to me”, at which point I said I am feeling very uncomfortable with this conversation is it possible we could finish this up?” because we write down all the paperwork And we were just “talking” as he said. Well that pissed him off. He said “well since you feel that way or just let HR handle it. You can go.” Very hateful. I took that as he wouldn’t advocate for me.

The building is massive, I had to get help to find him because he was in an area I’ve never been in, there are all these markings with arrows on the floor in different markings And they are very adamant about following that the correct path during Covid. Now I can follow and arrow, but they are areas that are unmarked and I’m not sure how to get to them from where I’m standing and I don’t wanna be yelled at. I’m done with directions and I’m bad at navigating those are two of my biggest flaws. We’ve had that conversation so when I was trying to leave all arrows are pointing back at me and there’s no way to get out. So I asked do you mind helping me navigate out of here. and they are very adamant about following that the correct path during Covid. Now I can follow an arrow, but there are areas that are unmarked and I’m not sure how to get to them from where I’m standing and I don’t want to be yelled at. I am done with directions and I’m bad at navigating those are two of my biggest flaws. We’ve had that conversation so when I was trying to leave all arrows are pointing back at me and there is no way to get out. So I asked do you mind helping me navigate out of here The asshole had the audacity to say to me “you’ve been here over three weeks and you can’t follow arrows?” , surprisingly I didn’t freak out on him but I did comment. “ Well, all these arrows are pointing towards me and there are X’s the floor and there’s these tick marks that I still know what they mean because no one’s explain them so if you wouldn’t mind just kind of guiding me I’d appreciate it.” He did everything but hold my hand in a condescending way and then lead me out. He asserted very rudely “stay 6 ft apart!”, I said “is there a visual way to gauge that distance? I’m not sure how to..” he stopped me “I’ll keep the distance, don’t worry about it.”

It was a very uncomfortable experience. I went to HR and got a complaint form and filled it out and I begged to talk to somebody because I couldn’t go back to work until I had a conversation. I ended up talking to the head of operations. And I explained everything since day one the issues I’ve been having and how I’ve not had a very good experience. He understood and for the first time I felt like somebody was listening to me. We’re gonna work things out about getting some accommodation done for starters. He is the boss of my manager and so he’s going to talk to him about how he made me feel. I did ask him not to be too hard on him. Because during the conversation intent to understand and into D escalate the situation was happening on both sides, it’s kind of fell through and at the end he got very frustrated and that’s where things got to go out of hand. Frustration I can handle because I get frustrated as well. But the last comment he made me were uncalled for and Preyed to my insecurities

For what it’s worth, later that night I’m assuming at his own volition he apologize for the way that things happened and he hopes that I feel comfortable coming to him when I have an issue. Truth is, I don’t. I’ve had enough bad experiences there that I just don’t. But the operations manager told me that we work the same schedule and if I ever need to talk about anything he’ll help me. It was nice to just have somebody acknowledged what I was saying. He thinks that both managers poorly handled my situation since day 1.

I just find that everyone is so quick to try to place blame on someone. I mean my third day of work my static schedule which I had to agree and sign to that’s not supposed to change, was changed and I got penalized for being “late” by 15 minutes by being 30 minutes early. There was no notification or warning in any documented or oral form. Well I did finally get that fixed and it wasn’t a big deal after speaking to six people, I did what I was asked to do and go to my area manager and express my issue with that. He didn’t conclude his statement until he told me that it is my responsibility to check my schedule. As well intentioned is that, it may have been a piss me off. It was my third day of work my schedule is not supposed to change I’m not supposed to anticipate changes that are that are out in left field. I wasn’t to blame for that situation! You cannot hold somebody accountable for something when there’s no documentation stating! Ugh!

I still harbor some pretty serious issues with the way that things went down. To be honest, I do not foresee a future here and I don’t see myself lasting much longer I am already looking for another job because I don’t think that this is gonna be a good fit.

I’m using text to speech so hopefully this makes sense on my phone. Just wanted to fill you guys in. It was a long long night, but at least I was able to vent to someone who truly listened to what I had to say. I felt heard for the first time since I’ve been there.