Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill3
Good job starting to see a therapist! 
These are good things to work on in therapy.
I suggest starting small. Take those little things that they could do themselves: What will happen if one day soon you tell them that you cannot do them, you have other plans?
With regard to your nieces: How often do they come over? How often do you really have time for them to come over? |
- if i said I had plans to do things like staying in this town home we are currently renting, or something small like having a couple weeks to myself without my nieces, they would ask why or how come, or what do you have to do? Basically they'd make me feel bad.
- my nieces are 8 and 11. I'm a teacher and started my summer break at the beginning of June. They came over in June for a week. In July, for a total of two weeks. Hosted my mom for a weekend and then my nieces just left last week. So, this summer I haven't been doing much but hosting family or going biking or kayaking occasionally.
When I was invited to go kayaking in mid-July (something I enjoy), I dragged my feet and my bf got mad. I felt guilty for spending even 4-6 hours with them because my sister would make a comment that I "always" do stuff with his family, or that she'll find out somehow. I can't be truthful or authentic. I lie about mostly everything. I have to keep things secret. Sometimes I just want to NOT care so much, but it's very hard.
Anyway I like my boyfriend's family: hands off, healthy boundaries, and hardly any drama. Just wish I didn't have to lie. Feels so childish.