I really relate to what you write, Fluffy
My ex-wife never believed I was bipolar, despite umpteen manic and psychotic and depressive episodes. She wanted me to be just an addict, so she could call me a scumbag and feel victory. Once the $3000 shoes and six trips to Hawaii and Paris a year were done, she could not leave fast enough. She did not mean the part about "in sickness.." She liked the part about shoes.