Sounds to me like she was free-loading on you; if she really cared about you and your relationship, she would have gotten a job herself as well, so you wouldn't have to work 2 jobs to support you both.


Bro, she is just using you; she had no remorse about being separated from you until you stopped the cash flow...


Again, actions speak louder than words


What made it strained? That she was working, or that you were going through so much stuff? Was she ever compassionate about everything you were going through?


Your ex seems to habitually show that she is very selfish; first she only wants you to work and support both you and her; then she wants to criticize every little thing you do in order to rationalize not spending time with you...and yet blame you for not spending time with her. Here you are, trying to be a great dad to your children, and she is completely uninterested in being a part of that magic whatsoever.


It is true that some marriages have a lack of sex for a time; maybe the wife or the husband is too busy or whatever, but to go for an extended period of time without it is a huge red flag. In addition, even after she goes to the doctor, and they tell her something is wrong with her biologically, she has absolutely no interest in fixing it so that you two can grow more in intimacy...this speaks volumes concerning her motivation for being with you, and how she is poisonous to you, in my opinion.


Again, she is showing her true colors...


This is so insidious; as the whole time she is telling you how if you cheat on her, you are through, she is cheating on you (from what you posted after this)


After she told you that if you cheat on her you are done; and you tell her the same...she sure has selective memory.


Yes, she is completely poisoning your whole life in my opinion. I'm SO GLAD you started seeing a psychiatrist, and she has helped you make sense out of some of this stuff. This lady is seriously bad news, and I would highly suggest you limit any contact with her to only talking about children and co-parenting stuff.


I am so glad bro


She keeps throwing you a bone, and you keep taking it...she is still playing you. I like Mark Manson's viewpoint on this, it's either **** yes, or it's no.


First off, you are not worthless at all; you have been around someone who has been putting you in so many mental hurdles, that you feel exhausted and overwhelmed with everything going on.

In a true relationship, when a woman actually cares about you, she will get a job and help you support you both, so that you can make it work. When you have hard times because of PTSD or the like, she will support you and help you get over them.

I hope you find that kind of woman in the future; but in the mean time, you have been through hell; now it's time to take a breather and let life settle down a bit. From everything you have posted, it sounds like you have been on a rollercoaster pretty much. Work with your psychiatrist and face some of the stuff you are having PTSD with. I hope she can help you with the nightmares and things.

War is war; it's not pretty, and it sucks. You are no longer in war, so now it's time to start to let go of what you did to survive while in war. It's time to accept yourself; all your crap and all your good stuff, and just accept yourself as if you were a child coming to an older you with all this hurt and pain. It's time to heal and get better and forgive yourself.

I hope this helps.

With compassion,

aklimatize