My T was wanting me to give my dad a letter that I had written...but tonight we were in the truck coming home from town and talking about this thing or that thing...then onto the subject of how he's always putting women down, etc. Well he said how I do it to men (yeah I'm guilty) and I told him "no, I won't be nice when talking about men who have r@ped me, strangled me, and abused me" and then he said women haven't been nice to him (they've either cheated on him or used him to buy their beer but beyond that nothing serious) and then I pulled the trump card...the thing that is the kicker with him. I said "well at least I don't give them excuses for doing it!" Wow...he shut up real quick and has been giving me the silent treatment ever since.

So it's all out...everything about how he's always made excuses for my abusers...and he knows he can't say anything about it. One thing about my dad--he hates when people are honest and direct with him about things. And when they make him responsible for his own behavior he can't stand it. He can't stand someone revealing his hurtful behavior. But it had to be done.

Funny but I feel a lot better now that it's all out. I feel like I've made a step in the right direction, regardless of his reaction.