I can't believe some of the things I hear about cyber bullying on here that people have been through. It makes me so sad to know how many people have had an experience.

I've been doing research and realize my bully, who used to be my friend, is likely a narcissist. I'm definitely an empath. So how this unfolded makes a lot of sense. The moderators of the site issued her a warning. I've been waiting for some kind of retaliation, but nothing has happened so far. I haven't been openly talking about it. I'm just trying to heal from the damage at this point. I know I will heal, but I don't think I'll ever be the same as I was before. This was a very scarring experience.

From the gaslighting and psychological abuse aspects of it, I've been questioning myself, my sanity. Like I know I have bipolar disorder, but I was like maybe I'm borderline and abusive to people, and I need treatment, there's something wrong with me, etc. I've been asking people if they've noticed anything about me, like severe mood swings and stuff. Those closest to me say I'm really stable. I've been questioning my whole reality and wondering if I'm some awful toxic person that deserves this punishment. But people, especially on the site, tell me I'm so wonderful, positive. That I'm one of the kindest people they've ever met and I'm so helpful and spread positive messages. That I'm valued and do so much for the community.

I'm just kind of sorting through what's real, what isn't. Some of the other bullies spread around that I'm a damaged and broken person. I've been questioning that too. Am I broken, damaged? Am I damaging other people? I try to be so self-aware and stay positive as much as possible. I've never really described myself as damaged or broken, I've gone through years of therapy, I'm a survivor of past abuse and worked through a lot of that heavy stuff. So being told I'm broken and damaged has thrown me for such a loop. My mind is all over the place wondering what I am, and who I am.