I can relate. My parents died young and I'm about a month from turning the same age as my dad was when he died. That's been on my mind for years. I feel like my time is running out and I'll miss out on being with my pups. To abandon then like my parents did. Neither being done on purpose, but it still feels terrible. Not really afraid of death as a whole, just in missing out the time with my pups so they know I love them and that I was there for them always. That's about my only goal in life. But because of that, I don't make the best use of my day and it makes me sad to think about what I could have done in life or what I still might be able to accomplish but just might not have the time.

Anyway, I understand. Hope this helped.