it's weird... some of us with drug/alcohol/impulse issues are quite intelligent and can be super functional (i have 3 college degrees and im a mess). but sometimes all we want to do is run ourselves into the ground. especially when theres pressure from loved ones to be different. as sad as it is, the best thing you can do is let him do his thing and make sure he knows youre there. if you try to control him it will make him worse. i just found new and more creative ways to drink cause i still somehow feel like its literally the only way i can tolerate being alive sometimes without being in extreme distress. and honestly i feel like, if the people closest to me dont like it, fine. ill get craftier and hide it better cause me being sneaky, deceptive and alive is better than me being dead.