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Originally Posted by Lonelyinmyheart
This is probably an absolute no-go but is there any way your T could see you privately? I know that's probably a lot more money even if possible... I'm only asking because I think most agencies here in UK are reluctant to see people face to face at the moment (understandably) but private therapists have more leeway if they are home based. I see my T privately and we made the decision for me to resume face to face as I was struggling so much. She still sees her other clients via teletherapy so either they're not bothered or they don't feel comfortable seeing T in person yet.
I know why you're so worried about telling him the extent of how you feel but I don't honestly think your T will find you selfish or unappreciative. Teletherapy is hard for many people especially in context with anxieties over the pandemic and the uncertainties about the future. It's only natural to want some in person connection with a safe person right now. Teletherapy isn't the same by any stretch. I absolutely hated it because I felt more disconnected from T. I hated feeling tearful and having her stare at me via screen rather than in person. Ugh. I know it's really difficult and I'm sure your T will understand that.
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Thank you for this! I see T privately at a clinic. He practices in various clinics as a private therapist, but also has his own practice. I think I will ask to switch to see him at his own practice if he returns to f2f before the clinic does (which I think is quite likely as he’s fully in control there). He does charge a little more, but at this point I don’t care anymore. I need the connection (if he’s ok with it too, I’d hate to feel like I’m pressuring him).
I think I definitely need to bring it up because it started affecting me quite a lot. I’m ashamed of feeling this strongly about it when there’s a pandemic going round and the world has bigger problems, but I’ll probably be unable to function if I don’t say something.