Hello Greenskyriver: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.

I'm sorry you are struggling with all of this. I'm an old person now. But I have been hitting / banging my head for even farther back into my youth than I can recall. As a very young child, I bumped my head every night to go to sleep. In fact, I used to have a picture of myself that was taken when I was probably around age 2. And, in the picture, you could see a circle I'd estimate was perhaps around an inch in diameter where my hair just above my hairline had been worn away from bumping my head. And then, as an adult, I've had a tendency to hit myself in the head with my fists when something went seriously wrong. However I also, some years ago now, developed the habit if hitting my head against walls, door casings, etc. So, as a result, I now have Meniere's Disease & tinnitus. (A few years ago I also developed a detached retina in one eye which I suspect may also have been the result of the head banging I did.)

I wish I could tell you how to stop your own head hitting / banging. I can't. I'm afraid there is no simple solution... at least not that I'm aware of. In my case, developing tinnitus (& realizing it could get even worse than it already was) was enough to stop me from doing it for the most part although I did (even quite recently) foolishly start up again for a short while which did predictably make my tinnitus even worse than it already was. So, as a result, although I had been off of all psych med's for several years, I ended up re-contacting my former psychiatrist & getting a prescription for Clonazapam (Klonopin) which is the only thing that seems to help. It doesn't take my tinnitus away. But it seems to suppress it to a degree that it is tolerable. Plus it is helpful for my anxiety.

So the only things I think I would be able to suggest here would be to start working with a psychologist or mental health therapist (assuming you're not already) with regard to what it is that is driving you to do what you're doing to yourself. And then I would also urge you to find an ENT physician who is knowledgeable with regard to the treatment of tinnitus & see that person as soon as possible. Depending on where you live there may also be tinnitus support groups you could join.

You mentioned you want to stop your head banging but all you can think about is other ways to hurt yourself. I've struggled with this as well. Plus you mentioned having thoughts of suicide. (I've tried twice.) One thing that helps me, in addition to the Clonazapam, is simply to keep busy. The busier I am, the less time I have to think about the things that cause me to want to harm myself to begin with. Also, being alone obviously makes it a lot easier for me to self harm. And then in terms of your head banging itself perhaps one really simple idea would be, as a stopgap measure, to wear a helmet of some sort... perhaps of the type worn by bicyclists. That's obviously not a solution. But perhaps it could help you to stop doing additional damage to yourself as you work on figuring out some more long-term solutions. You can obviously take the helmet off & go ahead with your head banging. But any little thing you can do to create some space between the thought of wanting to self harm & actually doing it is at least worth a try.

I wish I had something more positive & concrete to offer you. But I've been struggling with this for many years. And if there is a solution out there I have yet to hear of it. Perhaps other PC members will have some suggestions they can share. I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

P.S. Here's a link to an article, from Psych Central's archives, that offers suggestions for how to survive suicidal thoughts:

How to Survive Suicidal Thoughts