My doctor talked to me. He said that I could talk to him a couple times a week and get myself out of the bad state that I'm in to prevent hospitalization in the future.

He said that I need to stop researching so much about my illness and actually do the physics/math/geometry courses - To just do them even though I have a fear of failure - To overcome that.

He said that my schizophrenia is bad but he's seen people that are far more worse mentally.

He says I have a chance at being successful from mental illness and to find ways to do x, y, z if I can't do certain things - Just to get myself out of it.

He's going to talk with my mom alone about what to do to - Non-med wise in terms of therapy and focusing on the good things that i can do to prevent more hospitalizations.

He said to read books that aren't much of self-help books - Although I feel like I wouldn't have gotten this far without psychedelics - Like how aware I am now.. I would have still been more handicapped. So I have to give myself some credit for getting this far. My doctor reminds me of the video chat people that doesn't see how far I've gotten myself and how much better I've become over the years - But might as well take the heat without anyone knowing that now because that's life I guess..