Thanks everyone. I don’t always feel guilty, but sometimes I panic that I know too much and that he’ll find out somehow and be freaked out. Also the saving of photos of people he knows....not my proudest moment.

But it is something I do with everyone I’m interested in...not just T. With him I guess it’s more potent because I’m very attached. I feel like I almost need to preserve every crumb of info I find because one day it’ll be all I have left of him and that terrifies me. I think I lost too many people and something in my brain gets triggered to “preserve” memories as accurately as possible. Don’t think this makes much sense though.

@MoxieDoxie hahah at least you have less to feel guilty about! But maybe this is my calling and I’ll have to open a special office where people come to find out about their therapists. Sounds dodgy haha, but I’d probably earn more than I do in my current job.

@unaluna I know what you mean. My family was similar.

@BethRags, true, I haven’t hurt anyone. I think when I get anxious it feels like I have and that I’m a horrid human being for being so strange and attached and needy and ugh!