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I have found it helpful to accept that in my case my abusers were acting out of their own pain in a way that was toxic to me. It doesn’t diminish the abuse, my pain and it isn’t an excuse but it makes space for them to have had some good traits too.
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There’s been many a crooked path
that has landed me here
Tired, broken and wearing rags
Wild eyed with fear
-Blackmoores Night
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