When my T and I got here, there was no place forward to go. Even if he loves you back, what then? It just becomes an exercise in pain, with no good choices. Wreck everyones lives, and he loses his license , sit with love in the room that cant progress, but always wants to be more? They are (some of them) that this is the road to ruin and to harming patients, it is hard to manage those feelings in that relationship. For my T, he eventually realized I met many needs for him, as well as that he met my needs. We had sometimes very immediate and intimate love, and talked about what it could be. It came clear that it's a kind of tragedy to have a real love develop, an adult love that isn't transference. It was a hardwon lesson that cost lots of suffering. Sometimes love that remains unspoken can flourish and be beautiful.