I think he is not pushing because it isn’t his style and that is the biggest problem with her. I also think he flat out feels he needs more information. As her supervisor, if I were him, I would have some concerns when a client that is usually stable and flexible suddenly is extremely unstable and rigid every time they meet. He said today that he suggested to her that his thought was for her to be the fun playful one and he would be the strict one with the hard stuff. He wanted things light and easy with her and then the heavy duty work/trauma stuff with him. I told him my experience with her was very much the same as with previous therapists except that having worked with him I am better at expressing my needs and setting boundaries. I explained that I tried very hard to take what I learned from my early days with him to her... building the relationship as a foundation, the importance of good boundaries both ways, being contained/not going over my anxiety threshold and safety above all else. When I tried to do those with her I felt shut down, blown off and perceived as controlling. I told him I didn’t feel like there was any room for me in the room... he asked if the physical room was too small . So I explained how overpowering her personality, presence and need to control the process was.

Being her supervisor typically he gets her side of how she is struggling with a client based on her self perception. This time he gets both sides as inaccurate as they both may be... but it is a totally different view. I know she feels we are getting along great, she looks forward to seeing me and feels like we have really strong rapport. She doesn’t understand why I keep flipping out.