I have been told, by ''experts'' IRL that I am ''too sensitive'' and by one ''professional'' that I was ''blowing something out of proportion''.....that was clinically WRONG. this, apparently, made me ''paranoid'' according to this person. (this ''professional'' IRL) Another professional IRL told me I have a ''severe'' ''illness'' and discharged me. I did nothing wrong and paid massive amounts of money (I am not ''narcissistic'' or ''sociopathic'' etc)

I have found, over decades that I am a dumping ground for other people's anger. Some of them even demonise me and make me into ''the bad person''.... sometimes for years A very manipulative ''family'' member disowned their part in a few arguments we had (they and other family members had been cruel and mean to me for years...) and they turned all the ''family'' against me.

I am, I think, sensitive and empathic to others. I wonder if this is why people think they can get away with using me to dump their stuff on. Of course, if I object, I nearly always am split black.... not always, but it has happened ''too many'' times. I am in touch with ''reality''... although a professional irl called me paranoid, he did that to cover up his abuse.

Others have called me ''weak'' either because...

1. I am ''too quiet''

or

2. I talk ''too much'' and am ''too sensitive''

Apparently, being an insensitive jerk makes these people ''superior'' to me.

A relative said I am a ''flower''..... I do not know how to take that. I don't think they were meaning a ''snowflake'' but I don't think it was a compliment. Nothing like as bad as what other ''relatives'' have called me I thought ''family'' were supposed to be supportive?

Am I missing something?

I kindly request no references to the ''situation'' in the world since this is a trigger to me and also is unrelated to my question. This is a ''long term issue'' for me.

A friend IRL in my forest has also found no professional who listens or offers adequate respect (more than one friend in fact Maybe we get 6 sessions of respectful communication.... if we are lucky..... then we are ''on our own'' or are torn apart by their ''plain speaking'' (aka abusive words). I have not found a professional IRL in this forest who not only is not Narcissistic but does not adequately, or at all, hide this and try to be kind (I have studied NPD and am not just throwing that out..... I am familiar with Narcissism since both my ''parents'' were Narcissists (and very rejecting.... etc.....) (and probably one also was a Sociopath)

I do not know why I am such a ''bad person'' and ''weak'' and all those things they told me I am........ I wonder, could they have been projecting their own insecurity and darkness onto me?

ETA It is a trigger to me when people are mean to me because of trauma.

(not about anyone on pc)