Agreed. If he hasn't married you after 12 years, I think he's using you. I suggest you move on and establish a life of your own. But you might need support from your own therapist to help you. I say forget all this couples therapy--and don't let his whining about how much he wishes you were back, threats, or whatever he does to try to change your mind deter you. Okay?

By the way, welcome to Psych Central! I'm glad you've joined. We can be a support, too--and even a place to make friends and have enjoyable things to do--like the games.