Quote:
Originally Posted by KBMK
Sorry you felt like that. I hope you can feel better...I think that it sounds like you love your wife and want her to be happy and have a good night with her friends, and it sucks that you feel pain from your past that taints that. Do you trust your wife? Can you show your negative emotions at a different time at all? I mean can you have a conversation about your feelings in general and if there's anything she can do to help that isn't constricting her? My ex would get very cold with me after I had been out with friends or away for any time, and it was something I would have wanted to have talked about and worked out...but probably not that night, if you get my point. If your wife is shutting you out and showing no sympathy for your issues, though, I would imagine that it would be genuinely difficult to trust her? Are you getting any help for your issues outside your marriage?
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I appreciate your words. Ya, I get that you wouldn't want to talk it out while she was mad at you for going out. Too bad you never got to talk it out. I mean, I don't want her to be miserable and never have fun. I get that most people would find it nagging. I just think this kind of stuff could be worked out and come to a compromise. In the 3 years we've been together, she has never budged on this issue.
I admit I used to come to her angry about stuff like this, but even she has admitted that I've done a 180. In fact, in the last year, I've only once lost my cool over it. But she carries on like she's never done anything wrong and has no need to compromise because it's all my fault and all in my head and I'm just being controlling.