I agree with Sara that the issue isn’t abandonment here but quality of marriage overall. Anyone would be upset with such scenarios and things your wife does .

I think maybe it’s too painful to address true issue, so focus is shifted to mundane things like what women wear and shaming women for enjoying dressing up or assigning interior motives to them wanting to look good. I think true issue is that your wife is not a good partner, no matter what she is wearing. You can force her to wear burlap sack but it won’t make your wife and this marriage better