I'm returning to this thread. It needs to be revived.

I lost it on him yesterday (my husband). I found myself at a breaking point (again), so I told him I am sick of him trying to control everything, including ME, that I am sick of his demeaning and belittling so-called "jokes" that are aimed at me, and I told him I am sick of his frequent criticisms, telling me everything I do is WRONG, and that he knows the RIGHT way to do this, that or the other.

I said all that and then told him -- either you get on board and change these behaviors, and treat me with the respect I deserve, or I'm leaving you.

So, once again, I am at a crossroads.

And today, I've hit an all time low. I am experiencing a crippling type of depression. There are other issues at play, like him cleaning up after himself more, him taking on more responsibility in our apartment, and his physical ailments that prevent him from doing anything physical with me except for dancing when we go out for live music. I insisted as well that he help out in the apartment more and start cleaning up after himself more.

I've basically had it and am at my wits end. He improved vastly in some ways that I needed and asked for, and now I am seeing other things that also need improvement. I am thinking right now that I married the wrong man, if he needs THIS much improvement in order to make me truly happy. And I am kicking myself -- yet again -- for possibly making a HUGE mistake.

Then again -- I've been dating for more than 30 years. And EVERYONE has issues - mental, emotional, or what have you .And I've seen what's available and what's out there, and it's very slim pickings at my age. At the same time, I'd rather be alone and lonely than depressed, struggling, and deeply unhappy married to the wrong person.

And only just two weeks ago, I was telling him how much I love him, that I was SO happy he had made SO much positive progress and changes, and how I was proud of him for it.

Now this.

Granted, he lost his brother in the twin towers on 9/11, and 9/11 just came and went -- this is always a hard time of year for him. That is NO excuse for his behavior, but it may explain some of it over the last two weeks.

I just feel like crying, crawling into my bed and waking up when the world is better. I am emotionally and mentally exhausted and drained.