Hi there!
Were you asking me this? I’m ok but basically what I do is lay low. My daughter is 21 and hopefully moving out in November. Everything goes fine until you challenge her about something. If I do challenge her, it can escalate to the point she’s calling me unspeakable names and then after she never apologizes. She just ignores you until enough time passes you gradually start speaking again. I’m convinced she’s got a personality disorder that doesn’t allow her to accept being challenged so she manipulates every scenario to make it suit her.
One example of her (I think) refusing to accept responsibility and gaslighting and laying the blame elsewhere was the other night. I put the toaster oven on to make a pizza. When it beeped ready I opened the door and a plume of smoke came out. My daughter had made onion rings and left them in there. When she appeared a few minutes later, I said to her - you left those in the oven and smoke came out. She started by saying she had put the onion rings back in to cook for longer to which I replied- yeah but don’t walk away and leave them in there. Well, her reply raised my blood pressure so fast. She said - you should check the oven before you switch it on, effectively shifting blame. Luckily this diffused quickly because as I wrote on here the last argument over her telling me to wash a pot for her ended with her throwing me cheating on her father (there’s a story I’m not going into here) and calling me a wh**e. It’s kinda funny to me how she thinks I’m a wh**e when she’s mad at me but happy to live with me for free. If she hates me that much why is she living here? The truth is if I make her mad she brings out the most hurtful words she can. It never fails. So yeah I just don’t get in any conflicts with her and wait until she moves out. I definitely don’t have a normal relationship with her because I don’t think she loves me. And my feelings for her have become very guarded because Ive been hurt so often.
How are you doing?