We spent the last half of my appointment discussing this. She knew it was an uncomfortable subject for me so used humor to bring it up. Not making fun of me or the situation but kind of saying do you want to discuss it now or do you want to say T why did you have to remember the text and why did I even send it? We both laughed and I said all three were going through my head. It was a nice ice breaker.

We discussed why I feel disconnected and how I thought it was affecting my therapy as well as fears of her judging me lately and myself judging how I am feeling right now.. We discussed what happened to cause me to feel the disconnect. She reminded me that no matter what I said she would not be offended so it was okay to say whatever I was feeling. We talked about the drawbacks of teletherapy and how we can't feel the energy or the connection over video. She said that she herself has noticed a difference with clients but that right now we are stuck in this situation. She wishes she was in her office with me and a few of her clients and that she wishes she could hug me as she knows that is a form or reassurance for me. That led to a discussion on our shared faith as well as my need for validation and reassurance from the people close to me. she mentioned herself, my husband and best friend.l and how they all care about me and she wishes I had the self esteeen to trust that. She said she believed as we continue our work she believes I will be able to be my confident in who I am as well as that she, hubby, and best friend do care.

We didnt really discuss things that she could do to change it. However she definately spent the even being more open about the struggles she is dealing with (her son being in elementary school with a forever changing schedule, etc) made a few more jokes to help me, and expressing understanding of how I am feeling. It was helpful but we know it will be something that we will likely have to discuss again.