Hi Everyone,

Thanks in advance for reading my post!

I'm really overwhelmed and upset right now and I'm sorry that I need to vent.

My husband's work has slowed down during covid. He has complained a lot about needing more money, but I feel that for many years he has not had a lot of initiative. Anyway, something happened that I feel very guilty about. At the place where he works, he is paid by the project, not salary. A couple months ago a coworker placed some unreasonable demands on him, and even promised clients a finished product from my husband without confirming with him first. It was a mess, and I encouraged my husband to stand up to the coworker. He did, but it ultimately backfired. It appears that the coworker has started spreading malicious rumors, and now the company my husband does projects for has said they are seriously reducing his projects.

I am devastated because I feel partly responsible. Also, I don't know how my husband will pay the bills next month. He was upset, told me about it, and then started watching tv and acting happy and pretending like nothing was wrong.

I'm really frustrated, because in that situation, I would not be watching tv. I would be figuring out a plan to make more money. Or how to get more clients online, or who to network with. He has underearned for as long as I have known him. Now, with even less money--I am stressed out. I don't know if he thinks I will pay all the bills and he can watch tv all day or what. But I don't know how to help. He has resisted suggestions in the past. So now I feel like I have to sit in pain and watch him self-destruct. It's harmful to me also. I'm an empath, and it's totally derailed me.

I don't know if I will be able to sleep tonight. I am scared s***less. I don't know what I can do to help. I feel like this is tearing me down. And I'm really angry about it also. A lot of manipulative people have had a destructive impact on us. This has caused me a lot of pain.

Thanks for letting me vent.