Hi Guy, I hope you keep having breakthroughs and things get much better for you both...I really do! I also do think it sounds that there could be a problem of narcissism. It would mean that things could seem to get better, but there'll always be a big question (one I had to ask myself) whether your partner really wants the relationship to work for you both, because of mutual respect and love, or whether they want it to continue because of how it benefits them. I'm not saying that is what your wife is doing, but it is a very hard thing to know for sure, and it will only really show when you do have conflicts. I struggle with conflict...but like yourself, can see when I've legitimately done wrong and would attempt to remedy somehow. From what I know of (covert) highly narcissistic people they will feign remorse often completely missing the reasons for the upset, and cast themselves as the virtuous hard done by person...they always get what they want, but never have what they want, and will project their disatisfaction onto you. Every issue you have will be about them (cause everything is about them) and they'll ask you why you can't just be happy with them. Being with someone like that is exhausting.

I really don't want to undermine your breakthrough...but it strikes me that you're putting so much emotional energy into repairing...I just really hope that things are getting better for the right reasons