I relate deeply with this post. There's a trust in the whole ethos of therapy that is lost when a specific trust is broken , like in your case. I am glad about your second post, that a new experience is restoring some faith.

People here on PC saw the inevitable end of therapy for me long before I saw it for myself. I am still heartbroken- partly at the vast betrayal of trust and party because I too knew on some level that my T was manipulative and just not safe, although incredibly bright and charismatic. I can't help but miss him. We bonded with the classic trauma bond, and he even said he loved me. That was in no way love, though. Although I am the one who terminated( twice, a year apart), it is like an additional wound was opened that just will not heal.

I wish you closure and peace as you come to terms with the sense of being abandoned by your two caretakers when you needed them most.