So I have 2 kids my mother has been taking care of 1 since he was a year old and the other has been with me the whole 5yrs. When they were babies I loved and did everything for then but for some reason I never got that motherly instinct and I do love my kids but I could also easily leave them with someone I know loves them and will care for them without a worry and never look back... I'm tempted to leave the state and pretend I dont have kids I know it's wrong and it hurts to admit I could do that but I feel like I would be happier and better off and I'm sure he would be better without a mother like me he loves me to death but annoys the crap out of me I know I'm a horrible person and a horrible mother but he doesnt know that I need some advice idk what to do about my son loving me so much and me being the horrible mother I am not giving a damn cuz I'm thinking about other things...