Quote:
Originally Posted by Vegansphynx
I think there’s a bit of sunken cost fallacy...I put so much time and love onto the relationship that it’s mind boggling that it amounted to nothing. And of course, I loved him. It wasn’t all bad. And I stupidly kept holding out hope that if I just loved him hard enough, he’d treat me better. But not only did that not happen, but now he’s treating me like complete trash. Like I’m not even a person. And like the last 15 years never happened. All of his affection and attention is being put toward this new child junkie. And it IS gross, I agree! On so many levels. So you’re right to ask why I put so much value on him. I need to figure that out. I think I felt defined by his love (or what I thought was love.) like I somehow am not a full or complete or worthy person outside of the context of that relationship. So the question is; what do I do to rectify that within myself. Currently, I have moments where I feel like I can’t breathe. Or like there’s a rock in my chest. I’m scared to sleep b/c my thoughts turn to them together.
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Oh my dear. HE is the trash, NOT you. Since he abused and mistreated you, he is the person of LOW CHARACTER. And he lied and cheated. Do you see that HE is NOT worthy of YOU??
What you need to see and realize is your OWN WORTH. He is beneath you. He is a SCUM. You are worthy of SO MUCH BETTER than this.
And so he hooked up with a young meth addict? You were asking him to clean up - and he couldn't. So what he did? Was get involved with someone ON HIS LEVEL who will allow him to continue his addictions and who will enable him. You weren't going to do that. He could not clean up his act.
Oh, hon, you deserve SO much better. Once you truly realize this, it will hurt a LOT less. Be glad you are rid of him. Once the clouds clear, you will be able to see it this way.