I didn't want to submit to a crutch, some soft headed phyo-babble about a power greater than myself. God if you will.

It is my life, nobody was going to tell me how to live it. I can remember sitting in my living room drunk as a skunk, waving wildly at the front door and slurring the words "This is my house, this is my bottle and it's gonna be my way, if you don't like any one of them, don't let the door hit you in the ***** on the way out".

But as it turns out, I was blessed. Towards the end of my drinking career I was blessed with no more good ideas. Every one of my "good ideas" had blown up in my face. I was out of gas. At that point, I was beaten into a position of reasonableness.

With the help of men wiser than myself, I discovered I am surrounded by powers greater than myself all the time. Every time I looked in my rear view mirror, and saw those blue lights flashing, I knew that a power greater than myself was going to be tapping on my driver's side window soon enough.

The bottle was a power greater than myself, If I could quit on my own, I would have done so, and there would be no need to make my first meeting. I was staring a power greater than myself right in the face.

I accepted the fact that there are powers greater than myself out there. The question that faced me is can I find one that can relieve me of the obsession to drink.

"You may be suffering from a disease that only a spiritual experience will conquer." A good friend once said to me. He also said "If the word God runs you off, I ain't worried, liquor will run you back". Just for the record, by the time most people who try to control their alcohol intake, real control has slipped away some time ago.

Then he said, "If you think you can beat this game on your own, without a power greater than yourself, I wish you luck. But if you find that that just ain't happening, may I offer you a quote I'm rather fond of...

There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."

How do I thank someone for saving my life? I extend the same hand of friendship and hope that was so freely extended to me.

Your friend on this long strange trip
Richard S.