Oh man. Well, it sounds abusive what you're dealing with. I'm so sorry you've been dealing with such a nightmare for so long! And I'm sorry you don't have much of a support system. A therapist may be a good idea, if you can get one through your insurance?

Your plan to separate is a good one. I would just go ahead and do it. If you want the master, then tell him to move into the other room, but tell him on no uncertain terms that you want an official separation in house and that you plan on divorcing him. Don't even make it a discussion or up for negotiation. Just inform him - this is what is happening. Don't explain yourself. Just tell him - I want a divorce and as of right now, we are officially separated and you must move into the other room.

Then just ignore him in the home and use your own space.... do as you please. Come and go as you please. You are under no obligation to behave as though you're still a couple.

As for being a shadow of your former self? You will get your true self back in time - never fear. It will take some time, but if you get some therapy it will help you get back to yourself.

And once you are separated? You will immediately feel more empowered. And I guarantee you will start to feel better.

ps: I just noticed your username, NeedHopePlz -- mine is Have Hope. So perhaps I am meant to see your post and give you hope!