Quote:
Originally Posted by AceScot
I lie about how l feel mentally, l did it initially to keep my job but now lm back at work all the lies are piling the pressure on me as the expectations of my workmates and management are high and l cant fulfil them. My mental health has improved sightly but it still not great. I also tell lies to my close family l don't want them to know how ill l still am and suicidal.
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In my opinion, what you are doing is perfectly natural. I wouldn't even consider it lying. I want to start out by saying that it is not the healthiest coping mechanism. Everything is circumstantial, though.
I would consider it "guarding your feelings". It seems obvious to me that you are severely depressed and have suicidal thoughts. I don't mean any disrespect. I just know from personal experience that MOST people do not know how to handle it when we share these things with them. I know it's a hard pill to swallow.
The good news is, that everyone here has been through similar things or can at least handle you telling us about it!
I told you before my experience with divorce, suicidal issues, depression, anxiety, and a multitude of other horrible things. There's no need to "lie" here. I really like your posts. It helps me feel normal when you talk of the misery of having to let go of your wife. I know how awful that is. I know how hard it is to have to hide your feelings from your friends and family. They don't get it!
I don't know how they react to your depression but I'm guessing it's not very sympathetic. I'm guessing people say they are tired of hearing about it. Guess what! We are tired of feeling it!! Damnit!!!
Just trying to say that you are not alone. Don't beat yourself up for "lying" about your feelings. You deserve a break because you are worth it!!!