Unfortunately, men see things differently. It is important to pick your battles......saying what you think about anything is important, but some things aren't important enough to argue about. You can bet that if your husband shared that video with some guys that would all think it is funny. I didn't see anything in your post about abusive behavior; what has he said or done that you feel is abusive? My ex used to say sexist things, and I would tell him what I thought and then ignore him. It is difficult to change anyone's views on anything; all we can do is state how we feel.