It really has varied depending on the psychiatrist and therapist. I've only had three outpatient psychiatrists of any length. My most recent one I've been seeing for about 12 years. I absolutely adore him, and always have. I've told him in the past that my appointments with him were "the highlights of my month". Generally they were, not to say I didn't have a handful that were less than that.

I've seen several outpatient therapists throughout the last 13 years. Some were far from being good matches for me, so I eventually quit them. I have had one that I initially didn't feel comfortable with, but in the end I benefited most from her. My most recent therapist I've been seeing for about three years. I like her. She's been helpful, but not as much this past year. It's almost like she no longer has enough to offer "the me of now."

Truth is, these video/telephone sessions during the pandemic have been sadly unsatisfying. Even with my psychiatrist. Lately the video aspect has not been working properly, so it's just a phone call. I feel a bit of a disconnect with both, especially my psychiatrist, as a result. In some ways that may even be good. For a long time I dreaded the thought of having to leave my psychiatrist for Europe. The whole distance that the pandemic has created has also been a slow "weaning off", of sorts. Yes, it's for the best. Even so, my psychiatrist said that he would have video sessions with me for a short while, even when I'm in Europe. If it doesn't work out because of the technology, then I guess it will be a bust. It is deeply sad that I may never see him again, face-to-face. I don't really have that same sadness in respect to my therapist.