I can’t answer your question. I am not sure what you were looking for. I have no ways of knowing. All I know is what you posted. You described on and off relationship with a man who mostly treated you poorly and refuses to support you even though you think he should support you and it’s a common thing to do in your experience. If after 13 years of knowing him, he continues to treat you poorly and refuses to support you, I am not sure if you should waste time and energy on making him into someone who he is not.

If you think he might improve in his treatment of you and his desire to financially support you, then of course you could give it a try. But I personally think and know from long life experience (I am quite older than you) that it’s a waste of time hoping for people to change.

If it’s common in your area for men to support women, then you might have a better luck finding such men instead of hoping that this one changes his ways. It doesn’t sound like your boyfriend is interested in doing so. Plus he isn’t nice to you.

I wish you the best of luck