I was thinking about this recently (and how christmas has changed over the years for me)

I've never had a "good" or a " magical" christmas, none that I can remember or that stand out

but I do know when I was younger I'd get more excited- make an effert to leave the food out for santa. watch the muppet's. decorate the house. play christmas music- christmas was magical in another way (not because I had people to spend it with, it's because I had the childhood wonder of it)
and now that's all gone

I still hold my traditions (I still watch the muppet's, I still decorate, still listen to christmas music) but I've learned a lot over the years about christmas

their is no santa (and believing in him doesn't get you anywhere)

it is very stressfull buying everything and decorating

and, if you're like me and have no one, christmas is very, very, cold

and lonely