I know you won't respond to my email because that's the "agreement" (especially since the email isn't especially urgent). But I really do wonder if I'm going to escalate.

I realize that saying "I wonder if I'm going to escalate" sort of falsely puts me outside of the locus of control. Like, maybe a better patient would be saying, "I refuse to let myself escalate..." but that's not what's happening.

I'm kind of angry at you and I'm not sure why. I think it might be because you want to take my longing away from me, and I am attached to that longing. Or maybe because I am doing what you ask, trying to see you more three-dimensionally, and that highlights some of your shortcomings.

Either way, I wish like hell you would respond to my email, even though I know you won't.