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Originally Posted by divine1966
I can’t answer your question. I am not sure what you were looking for. I have no ways of knowing.
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I asked because it felt like to me that you had an assumption about what I was looking for. So can you clarify as to what assumption you had about my intention with posting this thread? Because clearly you had one.
And just to clarify, my intention was to hear from others on how they see the situation. My intention was not to be told trivialities about people. My intention was not to keep hoping or whatever you had in mind, lol.
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All I know is what you posted. You described on and off relationship with a man who mostly treated you poorly and refuses to support you even though you think he should support you and it’s a common thing to do in your experience. If after 13 years of knowing him, he continues to treat you poorly and refuses to support you, I am not sure if you should waste time and energy on making him into someone who he is not.
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Who said that I tried to change him for 13 years? I said that I'm finally changing stuff for myself, so I'm becoming active in this relationship. I was passive until now. And it will lead to wherever it will lead.
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If you think he might improve in his treatment of you and his desire to financially support you, then of course you could give it a try. But I personally think and know from long life experience (I am quite older than you) that it’s a waste of time hoping for people to change.
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I don't hope, **** hope, I never cared about hope LOL. Just so you are very clear on this one. Because your assumption is annoying.
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If it’s common in your area for men to support women, then you might have a better luck finding such men instead of hoping that this one changes his ways. It doesn’t sound like your boyfriend is interested in doing so. Plus he isn’t nice to you.
I wish you the best of luck
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Again, I'm not hoping for anything. Clear yet?