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SlumberKitty
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SlumberKitty is staying stable.
 
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
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Default Oct 20, 2020 at 04:41 PM
 
I have been feeling like my self harm isn't finished even though I am making good strides and keeping up the days without it. It will be nine months on Sunday. But I feel like I need to self harm and go get stitches in my arm in order for it to be complete. Even though I know that is utter rubbish because I have self harmed before and gotten stitches before and it certainly didn't make my self harm complete. I just get these thoughts like "one more good cut and then I can be done with it" and stuff like that. I know it is all lies. But it is hard to not listen to them.

So T on Saturday asked me to come up with a ritual where I can feel like I am finished with self harm. Has anyone here ever done this?

I ordered some anointing oil off of Amazon. I'm going to get a white candle and I don't know I am thinking something red (maybe juice) and light the candle, say some scripture, maybe drink the juice and then use the anointing oil on my arms. My T said this may take more than once to "take hold" where I feel like it's complete. I have a Judeo-Christian background so my ritual probably sounds religious in tone but it's really the only thing I can think of right now. I'll get the oil on Thursday. So tomorrow I need to get the candle and maybe juice or something else red. And then try it out and see what happens.


HUGS to anyone who wants one,
Kit

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