JBear34 wrote:
“Wow! I really miscalculated! Met with my therapist yesterday. I told her that I was feeling better and my feelings for her are beginning to fade. She told me that she is uncomfortable with my feelings, that I crossed a line, and was making the therapy about her rather than about me. I asked her if she had seen transference in other clients - I guess I was hoping she would say yes and tell me it is not uncommon. Instead, she said that she was not going to answer that question. Her demeanor was totally changed from what I had seen the previous seven-plus years I had been seeing her. She was cold, clearly uncomfortable, and distant. She said she could no longer provide good therapy for me. She, in effect, fired me as a client. This was quite devastating. Every thing I have read, including material written by therapists, said that I should talk about my feelings, and that a good therapist will handle transference well and try to find out what is really behind it.”

“ She responded as follows:
‘I want to acknowledge your email, and note how sorry I am to hear your anger and frustration towards me. I made the very difficult decision to terminate our therapy relationship after engaging in weeks of personal reflection, seeking guidance from the American Psychological Association, and through multiple consultations with practicing clinical professionals. - I truly wish you all the best.’ "
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I’m sorry this happened to you. How devastating!

Don’t share this if you don’t feel comfortable-
Did I miss it or did she say *why* she terminated you?

At first she was ok with you sharing your caring feelings with her. Then she terminated you because she feels you’re making therapy all about her? Couldn’t most good therapists turn that back around and make it about the client?

Could it be that it’s nothing you’ve done wrong...no boundary you’ve broken..but it’s this therapist who developed positive or negative transference or countertransference about you...and *that’s* why she said she could no longer provide good therapy for you?

I can’t see where you’ve done anything wrong.

I don’t understand why some therapists do this?

If they are so badly trained that they can’t handle transference feelings then I don’t know if they should be practicing.