I think I'm worrying about my level of need for T.

I've been in therapy for about 6 months. I'm 38, and this is the first time I've been in therapy. We're dealing with a lot of really triggery things that I don't know if I can post here (not sure what the guidelines are on that) - but suffice to say, pretty big, bad, yucky, painful stuff. Since this is my first time in T, this is my first time dealing with this stuff, and my first time even telling someone that some of it happened.

I know that I have PTSD, in addition to just a lot of painful feelings and anxiety resulting from having just brought this stuff out into the open. The time between therapy appointments feels like FOREVER (and I go twice a week). I need him to help me process this stuff. It's impossible for me (at this point) to open it up in therapy and then just shut it down until the next time I'm in there. Actually, that's what I was afraid would happen if I ever went to T and talked about it - and it turns out, I was right. We're working on "containment", but right now, it's just hard. I homeschool my three boys and have to really keep it together outside of T - and I do, on the outside, but on the inside, I'm unraveling a lot of the time.

SO! I have what I feel like is a LOT of contact with T outside of session. For example, I had session on Monday, and Monday night we talked on the phone for 15 minutes. We talked on the phone for about 5 minutes this morning. I've e-mailed him 2 times, and he's responded to one (he only responds if I specifically ask him to). To me, that seems like a lot. I don't call very often (this week was unusual for that) but I do e-mail frequently - sometimes every day (without asking for a response, usually). He says that it's fine - I can e-mail/call as much as I need to. But I don't know. I worry about it at the same time that I feel like right now, I really need it.

Argh. I'm obviously in a place where I need support, because this turned into a lot more than just the simple question in the subject line

Blah.

Anyhow, how about other people? Do you have contact with T outside of session? And how do you feel about that?