Resolved, I am going through a divorce right now, but a number of years ago, I wanted to work on our marriage and make it better. I asked my husband to go to marriage counseling but he refused. So that was the end of that effort, and I just tried hard on my own to make things work. What I didn't realize is that you can go to a marriage counselor BY YOURSELF and it can really help. I see a family therapist now by myself and I wish I had seen him back then. With him I have learned a lot about relationships, how to improve communication, good next "moves" to make in the relationship, how to set boundaries with my husband, self-destructive patterns I bring to the marriage from past relationships, etc. So you can really learn a lot that could help your marriage, even if you go alone.

Best of luck.