He is a loose canon for sure and I have enough reasons for divorce.

I suppose I was looking for validation of my experience and perception of him as being a narcissist, which I believe is true. I was gaslighted by my own father, therefore I constantly second guess my perceptions. I should have greater confidence.

Why does it matter? It matters. I need to know what I’ve been dealing with so that I can identify it accurately in order to heal from it in therapy. IF he's a narcissist, I have a pattern of getting involved with abusive narcs... see the importance? I need to know. My dad is one hence my patterns.

Divine, my husband is far more than just a jerk. The behaviors he exhibits are pathological in nature. I’ve studied enough about pathology through graduate work, through my prior professional life in social work, and through my own independent studies. It’s pathological, how he behaves, and it’s more serious than just having married an a hole.

I should have been a therapist. I can identify these things better than most therapists I’ve had.

Good news is I don’t love him. Yes the emotions I feel are raw and I am upset by things in my relationship, but I see the full picture now and I no longer feel love for him.