it’s not my intention to poke holes in your self esteem. It’s probably your husband’s goal. And that is my point. Narcissistic abuse is usually bombing your self esteem and is distorting your self image and I can see it.

Something tells me that you’ve been misunderstood and misinterpreted on daily basis by someone close to you (you know who) and this is why you react the way you do (it’s a symptom of abuse). I just want to point that out. I know it's important. I won't go further because I'd probably say something bad again.